I am so confused right now and I don't know what to say or do.  I never thought of myself needing an outlet or needing to get stuff off my chest until now.  I usually bottle these things up and wait for things to explode.  I know this can be a little unhealthy, but this is all I know.  Recently I have been trying to talk but it just does not seem to work.  It seem like the person I‘m talking to is getting frustrated or have their own problems that they are trying to figure out.

Where to start?  I just started a new job last week and I am somewhat still working for my previous employer part-time, however I am not being compensated.  The new job seem to be cool, I am just still trying to figure out  what’s expected of me so that I can make sure I meet those expectation.  As for the old job, I offered to consult for them to ensure that my transition out and the new employee has a smooth transition in.  It’s been a week now I have been work until 1 to 2 am some night, taking 2 to 3 hr of my workday (with the new company) to work on project for my old company.  The only person facilitating the conversation between myself and mgmt at my old company was my old Project Manager who was fired on Friday so needless to say I don’t think that my old company is willing to pay me for the things that I have been doing for the last week .  My wife is also making a transition from her current job to her a new job.  Lately she’s been working around the clock, for what reason I am not sure.  It funny she knows that they are taken advantage of her but yet she still does any and everything to make sure the task gets done even if that means to neglect  her family.  She seem to be one of the only people that I know that get more and more work as she is leaving.  Hopefully this will only be short term, but who knows.

I am wondering if 90% of the people that know me think I am dumb or something because these people tell me anything.  Half of them tell me stuff knowing that I may know the truth but still tell me anything.  I am truly trying to figure out who’s who.  Right now everyone is suspect and I am trying to separate friends from enemy.  I am finding out that I have been setting so far back observing these people and they feel that they can do and say whatever they want to me.  Because I have letting this go on for so long I am wondering if I can fix it or should I terminate these friendships.  It funny how many time I have been lied to and knowing the truth and for some strange reason I still continue to trust them.

As for my other issue, well I’ll be back.